Here we are, the last and final day of 2019. That shit is wild! But it is also a good time to start over (as we can every single day anyways) but today start over with intent.
This year I am grateful for all of the experiences, good and bad, I learned and grew because of all of them. This year I am grateful for making the dean’s list at Edinboro 3 times! This year I am grateful my company is safely idling and staying afloat and I still made a shit ton of money (for me) this year. This year I am grateful for my children absolutely flourishing and growing into such sweet and smart people! This year I am grateful for being away from our toxic life, every day we go into the future, the more it becomes a memory…. (but the pfa hearing in 1.5 years still has me super anxious).
This next year in 2020 I am setting my intention! I want to love me and focus on my kids, my last 8 classes before I get my degree, getting into my career, finishing my book and conquering my anxiety! I will also drop the remainder of my business cards all over Erie and Erie county this year also! I will also continue transforming my body and health so that my autoimmune diseases never get the best of me!
What are the things you are grateful for? What are your intentions for 2020? Make a list! conquer that shit!
I am excited for this next new chapter, I feel like I am going into the new year with only minor attachments and sadness, which I am still working through but I am grateful for my progress!
Next Monday will be 4 weeks… I miss my grandpa.. I wonder what the after life is like. I wonder if he is here with me. It is wild that he is not here to experience any more of my accomplishments with me but I know he is always here, in spirit form, but it doesn’t change the fact that I cant ever touch him again or talk to him again or hear him call me Crash. This was the biggest loss for me in 2019. I have never lost anybody close to me before and it has been so tough and it comes in waves. Sometimes I just forget that he is gone until it hits me and then I am just sobbing again and I wonder if that will ever stop, probably not.
I just want to go into 2020 with clarity and acceptance of things, people, and situations, that I cannot change. I have no hate or animosity towards anybody (but still keep your ass away from me if you’re toxic or if its court ordered). I hope for everybody to be able to be happy and healthy and successful in their own right. Go after your passion and your dreams and do not let your fear stop you! Everything you want is on the other side of fear! I promise you that!
Don’t stay where you aren’t appreciated, don’t force people or things to stay in your life that are not meant for you. Do not waste a single second of this life being miserable because of other people in any way shape or form. Every body is on their own journey, no need to compare yours to others. We can cheer each other on, as it is not a competition with each other, we are in our own competition with ourselves. All I want to do is better than I was yesterday and be better in 2019 than I was in 2020.
Go live in your creation!
I wish you luck, light, and love in 2020!
Happy New Year from Kristina with Healing Haven & DanteSkyy Collaborative